Humbly Hospitable

This is dedicated to all the families and friends who opened their homes and hearts to me during these last eight and half months. They will all likely tell me I didn't need to write this, but it must be shared.

India is the land of hospitality. Whether one has money to put milk on the table or not, you will be offered tea. Whether a car is available or not, you will be offered a ride. Whether they were planning on eating that one dish you love that night or not, they will make it for you (in large quantities). This entry is far overdue and has been constantly in my mind since I arrived here in August.

For those of you who don’t know, prior to my coming here for this chapter of my life I had only come 4-5 times before. And, those times were only for a maximum of three weeks. I’d traveled to most other continents in the world, but hadn’t ventured to discover the land of my ancestors. I always had a hard time defining my level of culture and my coming to India was a solution of sorts.

I’ve learned many things for this place. I won’t try and summarize what I’ve learned because I think it would be a bit premature and hopeless. However, hospitality and selflessness are two things I can wholeheartedly say I’ve experienced and hope to keep with me. I can’t begin to express the amount of love I’ve experienced while in India. So many people have opened their homes and treated me as their own child.

My time in Ahmedabad is, of course, crazy near and dear to my heart. As you may have heard, we lost my mother’s mom and nephew within a span of two weeks late fall. It was a tragic time and the loss is still being felt today. Both losses came only a few weeks after I had moved to my masi (mom’s sisters) home. And while we were all grieving, I grew incredibly close to my family there. I had tears in my eyes as I type this now.

The hospitality I felt living there was incredible. I was immediately taken in as a sister and daughter. My masi would take me shopping as if I were her own and help me pair kurtis and salvaars. She’d help me match my dupatta and make my favorite dishes at home (kitchidi and baath ni mutiya, for anyone asking ;)). My masa would give me the love and motivation my own father would give me in the States. He’d ask me questions about my day and help me understand some of the Indian nuances I was facing. Priyanshi, my cousin sister, would make me laugh and introduce me to her friends. I could ask her anything and everything and she’d help me find an answer. She is my younger sister now and I’m going to miss hanging out with her terribly.

Priyanshi (cousin-sister), Priti-masi (mom's younger sister), Saurin-masa (masi's husband), and me 

Priyanshi and I

Mother daughter bonding

My masi and masa were dying to meet some of the girls I volunteered with so they hosted pani puri night at home- (from left to right: Jinal, Tapasya, me, Stuti, Madhavi). Tapasya, Stuti, Madhavi and I traveled to Rajasthan a few weeks after this picture was taken.

My mom’s elder sister and husband in Varodara, as well as their daughter in Bangalore, also opened their homes and hearts to me. My masa (mom’s sister’s husband) became my personal encyclopedia. I would ask him everything under the sun and he would respond with an answer, or call a friend and ask. I learned so much about life from him. He taught me about my ancestral religion- Jainism- and taught me about how to live a happy life (apparently the key is selflessness and honesty). He inspired me to read more and to keep being curious.

Mota-masi (mom's elder sister) and Nilesh-masa  (mota-masi's husband- the man who knows something about everything)

Gandhi family trip to Palitana (a Jain pilgrimage sight)

Celebrating Priyanshi's birthday in Bangalore (Gandhi sister reunion)- from left to right: me, Evan, Niyati-didi, Kriday, Rachana-didi, Priyanshi

A funny picture from our Gandhi sister reunion in Bangalore :)

Anand is where my father is from and where I spent Uttrayan- Kite Festival (so many festivals in India I still haven’t blogged about). My family there held a three-day extravaganza for the holiday. There were other family members from abroad visiting at the same time. My bhabi (cousin brother’s wife) and I had a conversation one night about how creatively they had planned the weekend. There were games, prizes and talents shows. I am a bit intrigued to see if we can bring that sort of fun to the Doshi’s in the west (yes…I’m thinking Mother’s Day weekend guys).

Some of my cousins in Anand (and guest appearances by some others), from left to right: Priyanshi,  me, Nidhi, Nishu, Prapti, Devangi, Purna, Hemabhabi

Visiting Mumbai turned to be a consistent event. Every couple months I’d find myself in Mumbai and overwhelmed with a number of places to stay. Family friends would open their doors to me and offer their help regarding my travel plans. My time would always be a little flustered because I’d want to meet so many people and not leave without saying hello. I’m still in shock as to how amazing it has been getting to know some of our family friends on a more casual level. There is something special about being able to plop down on a couch and just have a random conversation about life. The spontaneity of it strikes an appeal to me.

Hiloni-bhabi, me and Shilpa-kaki

My dad's cousin Kuldip-kaka, Shilpakaki, and I one of my last nights in India

Hanging out at home in Ghatkopar with my cousins Purna and Prapti

Even while traveling around India (in Rajasthan and Kerala) I received messages to confirm my safety and happiness. I am floored at this love and would like to sincerely thank all the hosts I’ve had while here, this trip would never have been what it was without your generous hospitality.

I hope to have the opportunity to be as good of a host as people here have been for me.

Pooram in Thrissur

Traveling without adventure is not fun, right? Well here’s a good one: we were emailed two days before our arrival to Thrissur (the location of Pooram- a gathering of hundreds of thousands of people) that our hotel booking was canceled.

Had we already received a confirmation email over a month before? Yes.

Were there any other hotels available for a reasonable price? No.

Were we really really frustrated with booking.com? An understatement, but yes.

That little bump in the road was a miracle in disguise though. My friend Brianna had been “couch-surfing” before we met and had amazing experiences to report. By the way, couch-surfing is an online community connecting travelers with local residents who are open to hosting people at their home for free. I had heard her amazing stories and was intrigued and excited. So, we went on the website and started messaging folks in Thrissur. Within a day, Aniket emailed us back and confirmed that he, his mother, and auntie would love to host us- unfortunately, his wife was out of town. His sincerity was evident as soon as we met him at the train station on Saturday evening.

He picked us up in an AC car and we all exhaled in relief of the cool air. He drove us around and showed us some of the decorations that were up for Pooram.

We arrived at his home around 10:30PM and his mother greeted us with a smile, broken English and mango juice. The next morning at breakfast was when we got to know more about the family. They are actually Maharastrian but relocated to Kerala about 25 years ago. I learned they were Jain (religion - same as my family) and began asking more questions about the religion and sharing what I knew and learned with Brianna and our other friend Mona who was traveling with us. Then I learned Aniket has a brother who in an architect in Ahemdabad. I left the breakfast table stuffed (so many mangos) and feeling very much at home.

Aniket walked us down to the temple area where Pooram was taking place. The festival is a competition between two temples (Krishna temple named Thirumbady and Bhagwati temple named Parmekavu) and involves 51 elephants adorned with decorations to show dedication to the temples. Here is a quick video from the day before of the showcase displaying what would be used to decorate the elephants. 

The festival goes on for a day and a half straight (7AM Sunday – 4PM Monday). The first event we attended was around noon where somewhere between 9-13 elephants walked up to the Thirumbady temple. From there they receded back to Swaraj Road (a 3 km road encircling the temple). After the event, we walked around and found some of the decorations for the next event. 

One of the elephants leaving the temple

Some of the decorations that would be used for the event in the evening

The second event we attended was Kudamattom (kuda – umbrella, mattom – changing) where 15 elephants from each temple compete in the changing of umbrellas. Each temple takes turns showcasing an umbrella (the middle one is always a different color). This went on for about an hour and a half as each temple showcased over 50 umbrellas. Over 100,000 people gathered to witness the competition and the crowd cheered for whichever umbrellas they were most impressed by. Each temple started off with mildly decorated umbrellas and concluded with polka dots, neons, and even LED lighted umbrellas.

The first elephant (of 15) coming to greet the audience of thousands. The center elephant always enters first and is adorned more extravagantly than the others.

All fifteen elephants lined up competing with the other fifteen elephants located about 150 yards away

Note the crazy crowd (entire crowd was probably 50 times this many people) and the fact the center elephant has a different colored umbrella and additional decorations

The final event we attended is called Vedikettu- a firework display at 3:30AM. It was a…memorable experience. Aniket reserved tickets for us to view the fireworks from a building on Swaraj Road. We were required to be at the building by 11:30PM, so in true India form we arrived by midnight. The fireworks, as promised, began around 3:30AM. What we realized first was that our definition of fireworks was different from Thrissur’s definition. What went off at 3:30 seemed more like bombs to us. I learned later that each explosion was propelled by a 30-40kg bomb that created a crazy loud flash in the sky and shook the crowd with its force. Windows in the building we viewed from taped the windows to ensure they didn’t shatter and car alarms sounded effortlessly. The “fireworks” were done by each side as part of the competition. After about 5 minutes of explosions there was a 15-20 minute break and then the other temple showcased their “fireworks”. After that round most people left. We stayed because Aniket told us the next set were slower and more beautiful. They were- similar to the Disneyland fireworks I’m used to, these were beautiful and colorful.

Aniket, Mona, Bri and I waiting for the fireworks to begin- I feel like 3:30AM in a terrible inconvenient time for fireworks

A collage of the pretty fireworks - after the firework-bombs were done

We were so fortunate to have an amazing host for our time in Thrissur. His mom (Shweta auntie) even gave us a cooking lesson the next day and we tried to make those Kerala parootas we were obsessing over.  More on that cooking lesson later. 

Aniket in center with his mom to the right and his grandfather's sister to her right, Bri and I enjoying the amazing food and company

Sakhat South India Travels

Sakhat means wonderful/awesome in Gujarati and Hindi

Post yoga teacher training (YTT), I met up with my friend Brianna who I met while working at Deloitte. She is spending 6 weeks traveling in India and we coordinated to spend time in Kerala together. It was so great to travel with her and we definitely created some lifetime memories. One of her first world traveling trips, when she took a 5 month sabbatical almost 2 years ago, was an inspiration for my trip. Check out her blog here: whereintheworldisbabyjewel.blogspot.com

Brianna and I en route from Trivandrum to Kanyakumari - Day 1 of the trip

We met at India Coffee House in Trivandrum on Sunday morning, April 14th. The architecture of the building is quite interesting- built in a spiral formation- and the food was tasty and inexpensive, just like the other branch I went to while in Jaipur.

Enjoying breakfast at India Coffee House

Building view from the outside- almost directly opposite the Trivandrum  train station

Note the spiral architecture